Fandango’s Flashback Friday: February 12

February 12, 2021 ~ oneletterup ~ 15 Comments

Wouldn’t you like to expose your newer readers to some of your earlier posts that they might never have seen? Or remind your long term followers of posts that they might not remember? Each Friday I will publish a post I wrote on this exact date in a previous year. How about you? Why don’t you reach back into your own archives and highlight a post that you wrote on this very date in a previous year?

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This post was published February 12, 2019 as an entry for Irene Waters’ “Times Past” Challenge. I always enjoyed participating in these “look back” challenges, as they fit right in with my diary 2.0 theme. With this one in particular, I am struck by how “tales of fear” from parent to child have changed over the years. Now there’s a virus added to the ever growing list.

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Tales of Terror: Times Past

Irene Waters’ “Times Past” prompt challenge topic for February is: Tales of Terror

Can you remember any tales of fear that your parents used to stop you going out of bounds. Please join in giving your location at the time of your memory and your generation.

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jungle gym — on top of the world circa 1962

As a baby boomer growing up in the USA suburbs, I basically roamed the tree lined streets of my working class neighborhood. On foot. On my bike. On my skateboard. On roller skates. I specifically remember the house I lived in from the age of 4 to 11. There were woods to explore at one end of the street before it curved uphill to circle around to the next block. Houses lined up close together and near to the street.

My mother issued two clear directives to keep me safe:

Don’t take candy from strangers.

This was in the context of a stranger driving around the block, who might stop, open the door and try to lure me into his car with a Nestle’s Crunch. I would then never be seen again. And terrible things would happen…which were never spelled out in any detail, but an implied tale of terror just the same.

I will admit I considered possibly grabbing the candy and making a run for it. However the opportunity never presented itself.

Being the immortal child that I was, I was unafraid to ride my bike for hours at a time…for long distances that perhaps would have been prohibited if I had advertised my adventures. Which I didn’t.

A favorite trip: to “the little store” on the other side of town…saved my allowance and bought my own candy. Smarties, Mary Janes, Mounds, tiny wax bottles (remember those? argh), button candy, Bazooka Bubble Gum. No strangers needed. Sometimes I let my younger sister tag along, swearing her to secrecy.

Interesting side note: when we first moved there, my sister was 3 years old. One day she packed a lunchbox with napkins, hopped on her tricycle and took off…without telling anyone. Her destination: where we used to live…a long car ride away. A dozen houses later – almost a quarter mile – she arrived at the far end of our road, about to pedal down the cross street. A dangerous intersection at the crest of a hill. The neighbor on the corner stopped her in time and called the police.

So my sister got a ride in a police car…which is where she was eventually spotted by my frantic mother. Who had grabbed me and my infant brother and probably went looking for strangers with candy. An actual tale of terror thankfully averted.

Don’t go near Tony M.

Tony was a mentally challenged teenager who lived a couple of blocks away. At least I think he was a teenager…to my young eyes he could have been in his twenties. He lived with his parents and sometimes wandered around looking somewhat disheveled. It was never explained to me what he might do. Or say. But the look in my mother’s eyes spoke fear. My questions about why went unanswered. I rarely saw him, but when I did he mostly looked lonely and sad. I wonder what happened to him.

554 calvin 1958030 — Family gathered safely on the front porch – 1958

Fandango’s Friday Flashback: July 3

July 3, 2020 ~ oneletterup ~ 18 Comments

Inspired by Fandango’s Friday Flashback: July 3

Wouldn’t you like to expose your newer readers to some of your earlier posts that they might never have seen? Or remind your long term followers of posts that they might not remember? Each Friday I will publish a post I wrote on this exact date in a previous year….Why don’t you reach back into your own archives and highlight a post that you wrote on this very date in a previous year?

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I wonder about young children today. What will they remember in the years to come? Just staying distant and wearing masks?

Apparently bicycle riding has become more popular since the pandemic began – among those with access – so perhaps kids forced to stay “distant” will be more apt to gravitate toward solitary outdoor play such as this. I hope so.

“Zooming,” however, takes on a whole new meaning.

The following post was originally published on July 3, 2018

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Bicycles: Times Past

Irene Waters’ “Times Past” prompt challenge topic for this month is: Bicycles.

https://irenewaters19.com/2018/07/01/bicycles-times-past/

I am a baby boomer and grew up in the suburbs of New York and New Jersey, USA

I remember always having some type of 2 or 3 wheeled transportation to call my own when I was a kid.

I started off on a tricycle and stepped up to a “big girl” bike around the age of 5 or 6. Pink, with coaster brakes and a loud horn, this bike was my ticket to freedom – once I fully learned how to stop…. My most vivid bicycle memory is the day my father removed my training wheels. I started pedaling in front of our house – at first wobbly – but with my father’s hand steadying the back I managed to remain upright. I picked up speed as I – by myself!- headed toward the end of the street. After flying by 2 or 3 houses I realized I had absolutely no idea how to slow down and stop. Either nobody told me it was the same as with the training wheels or I simply forgot. Brain cramp. So what did I do? I clearly remember the heart thudding moment-of-panic as I made a split second decision (perhaps my first and that’s why I remember it so well). I steered into the curb and fell over onto the asphalt. Nothing broken. Just a few bumps, scrapes and bruises. Lesson learned.

Bike 1 — circa 1959 – my new bike (sister not impressed…)

Despite my early braking mishap, I absolutely loved riding a bike and rode with no fear. When I outgrew (or wore out) the pink one, I got a bigger white bike in the 5th grade. Coaster brakes again. In those days, still no helmet. Despite the fact that my father kept accidentally bumping his car into my “new white bike” (as noted in my diary) it lasted quite a few years. The garage was small for a car plus multiple bikes. There were 4 kids by then.

When I was 10 and 11, I often rode to the small grocery store/strip mall that was 6+ blocks away. Errands for my mother or to get bubble gum and comics for myself. Or sometimes to sample all the perfume spray testers at the drug store with my girlfriend Kathleen. It was mostly downhill from my house. I’d start at our backyard (which bordered another backyard) and take off bumping over grass, tree roots, gravel and into the neighbor’s yard in back. I’d jump the bike over their curb and into the street, turning right. Zooming past about 4 houses, I turned left and then…the best part – a hill straight down bisecting at least 4 streets on the way to the main road and my destination…the Acme! The drug store! My hands flung out to the side. Feet off the pedals. The wind. Nothing like it before or since. Sometimes I’d shut my eyes for a second or two. Riding back home…uphill…was another story altogether; but totally worth it.

Bike riding was crucial to my quest for exploring the vast suburban wilderness. The many blocks to the candy store, the woods at the end of the street, my friend Kathleen’s house two blocks away. My parents didn’t and couldn’t track me. “Be home by….” was all the direction I got. Priceless freedom.

When I neared the end of high school, I saved up and bought a “folding” bike which I brought to my summer job at a camp in NH. It saved space during travel and was fairly simple to store. I also brought it with me to college where I rode it from one end of campus to the other. Since my first car took center stage after college graduation, I sold my folding bike and moved on.

As an adult – in my late 30’s or early 40’s – I owned a bike again. I wore a helmet. I rode it around the rural neighborhood street where we were raising our kids. Around and around. Kind of boring. I was no longer as fearless. And what’s with the hand brakes??

Shoes: Times Past

May 30, 2019May 26, 2020 ~ oneletterup ~ 22 Comments

Irene Waters’ Times Past challenge prompt for May is: Shoes

Have you any memories of shoes? A particular favourite pair, one that caused you pain, embarrassment or made you feel on top of the world?

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I grew up in the USA suburbs as part of the baby boomer generation…wearing shoes my mother deemed practical and sturdy.

I was a very active tree climbing, kickball playing, jump-roping child. Sturdy was a good idea. Sneakers would not have lasted long on my busy feet.

Shoe shopping was carefully planned. Piled in the car with my siblings, my mother would drive me to “Kate’s Brothers,” the downtown shoe store. Shoe polish fumes hung in the air as a salesman measured our feet with a tool called the Brannock Device.

What a fascinating place…

I loved the machine (a fluoroscope) I could slide my feet in…for a quick x-ray. Looked in the viewer…and saw my bones! I don’t remember this questionable practice lasting very long and probably for good reason. It was, however, a fun way to wait while salesmen searched in the mysterious “back room” for our shoes.

Play shoes. Party shoes. Sneakers.

Play shoes were always leather – definitely durable – with laces or sometimes a strap. Color choices limited. Usually brown, navy blue or the occasional black and white saddle shoe. My go-to footwear for outdoors. Quickly scuffed and dirty, they withstood what I put them through.

I have no idea why I am wearing them with my red dress.

Party shoes were black leather or shiny patent leather with a strap. Often called Mary Janes. I wore them to parties, holidays and Sunday School. The patent leather ones could be shined up with Vaseline petroleum jelly.

Keds or P.F. Flyers were the only brands of sneakers available. White or blue canvas with white laces. Only allowed for gym class. I was very jealous of my one and only cousin – 5 years older than me – who was allowed to wear sneakers All The Time. My mother thought she was spoiled. I thought she was incredibly lucky. Sneakers were much more comfortable than tight laced up leather shoes. Better for running faster and jumping higher.

When I was 11, we moved to a neighborhood with no trees to climb or woods to explore. My active outdoor play life came to an end – for better or for worse. I didn’t need “play shoes” for hanging out with my girlfriend listening to Beatles records or 77WABC Top 40 hits on the radio.

What did girls wear in junior high? Loafers! – sometimes with a shiny new penny inserted in the slit atop each one. Earning them the nickname Penny Loafers.

They were my first slip-on shoes. Usually brown. Since they were flats, I could be comfortable and stylish at the same time. At 5’7″ in the eighth grade, flat shoes were a definite bonus.

Still leather…but without laces or straps.

I felt very grown up.

loafers — Loafers & a camera
Family day trip

School Uniforms: Times Past

March 23, 2019May 25, 2020 ~ oneletterup ~ 12 Comments

Irene Waters’ “Times Past” prompt challenge topic for March is: School Uniforms

For this months times past I thought we would look at school uniforms or lack of them. Do you see a value in wearing a uniform. For those in countries that don’t have uniforms would your prefer to have one. Tell us your memories of what you did with your uniform to make it a little more attractive. Any memories at all.

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As a baby boomer growing up in the USA, I went to public schools. No uniforms. But there were rules about what to wear. Would it have been easier to have worn a uniform? I’m not sure, except perhaps as an equalizer between the haves and the have nots. Or the fashionable and the not so fashionable.

Gym day for girls in grammar school meant I could wear pants (and sneakers!) to school. My favorite day for both reasons: pants plus gym.

High school rules governed skirt length until I was in the 10th grade…and girls were allowed to wear pants. Hallelujah. I will just barely mention the ugly one piece green jumpsuit type “uniforms” we had to wear in high school PE class. I had to sew my last name on the back. I always felt sorry for the girl in my class whose last name was Zitts.

Girl Scouts.
Now that required a uniform.
I started out as a Brownie and worked my way up to Cadette, excelling at cookie sales…not so much at sewing.
I lasted through the 7th grade, at which point all the rules and requirements didn’t appeal to me anymore. I was a questioner. That did not jive with many Girl Scout Laws.

I also pushed the envelope that year during the troop trip to DC. I spotted boys in a hotel room window across the alley from our hotel room. I was 13. Called them, giggled and hung up. A few times with my roommates. I managed to talk my way out of being sent home.

When I was 10 and 11 years old, I went to a Girl Scout overnight camp.

What did I love about it?
Being outside. Hiking. Campfires.
Making Campfire Stew. New friends.
Arts and Crafts.

What did I not like?
Mosquitoes. Latrines.
Eating cold canned Spam on hikes.
Uniforms.

The required uniform: white (yes, white) short sleeved blouse, green belted shorts, green knee socks and a rope lanyard. Not comfortable. And even at that young age, the regimentation of it bothered me. It made no logical sense. Who wears knee socks in the summer? (although I think I skipped those on occasion).

This photo was taken on the first day…while the uniforms were still clean! The 3 counselors are in the middle front row. I am standing, 6th from the left.

When I was 13, I went to a YWCA overnight camp.
No uniforms and no canned Spam!
I stayed for a month.

Tales of Terror: Times Past

February 12, 2019 ~ oneletterup ~ 11 Comments

Irene Waters’ “Times Past” prompt challenge topic for February is: Tales of Terror

Can you remember any tales of fear that your parents used to stop you going out of bounds. Please join in giving your location at the time of your memory and your generation.

~~~

My mother issued two clear directives to keep me safe:

Don’t take candy from strangers.

I will admit I considered possibly grabbing the candy and making a run for it. However the opportunity never presented itself.

Don’t go near Tony M.

Horses and Childhood Dreams: Times Past

August 6, 2018 ~ oneletterup ~ 5 Comments

Irene Waters’ “Times Past” prompt challenge topic for this month is: Horses and Childhood Dreams.

https://irenewaters19.com/2018/08/01/horses-and-childhood-dreams-times-past-challenge

I am a baby boomer; growing up in the USA suburbs. Houses lined up one after the other in my neighborhood; no farms or horses. I never dreamed of having a horse. None of my friends had horses.

The only animals I was familiar with were dogs and cats. Family pets. Horses existed on television shows like Mr. Ed, Bonanza and Lassie. Mr. Ed was my personal favorite! I went on pony rides at county fairs, although they made me uncomfortable. I was sad to see ponies trudging endlessly in a circle. They looked trapped.

My first memory of anything horse-like was a red wooden rocking horse. A gift for my 2nd birthday. I apparently rode it with great abandon, springs squeaking in a steady rhythm. The springs were my favorite part – more bouncing up and down. I was a very active kid so it doesn’t surprise me. I will admit that some of this memory is from an old 8mm (silent) home movie – close to 3 minutes of me energetically riding my first “horse.” Somehow I do remember the squeaking. Perhaps from my younger siblings years later.

I went horseback riding once – at Girl Scout camp. It was a big deal because it cost extra. The horse took off galloping and I didn’t know what to do. Painful.

So…I am one of those exceptions to the theory that all girls dreamed of horses.

I actually dreamed of flying! For years it was how I fell asleep at night as a young child – starting up the dream as I closed my eyes. Run, jump and up I went. But that’s another story.

1956 rocking horse005 — 2nd Birthday Horse Ride in my party dress

Bicycles: Times Past

July 3, 2018July 3, 2018 ~ oneletterup ~ 7 Comments

Irene Waters’ “Times Past” prompt challenge topic for this month is: Bicycles.

https://irenewaters19.com/2018/07/01/bicycles-times-past/

I am a baby boomer and grew up in the suburbs of New York and New Jersey, USA

I remember always having some type of 2 or 3 wheeled transportation to call my own when I was a kid.

The biggest change: Times Past

June 18, 2018June 18, 2018 ~ oneletterup ~ 10 Comments

Irene Waters’ “Times Past” prompt challenge topic for this month is: The biggest change: https://irenewaters19.com/2018/06/02/the-biggest-change-times-past/

The biggest change I notice in my lifetime…so far…is the way we communicate.

When I was growing up (in a United States suburb) we talked to each other more directly. All the time. In our homes. In school. On the playground. On the street. Whether we liked it or not, we needed to listen. If we didn’t talk, either in person or on the phone, we wrote notes or letters – by hand.

As a very young baby boomer, I grew up in a household with a landline and several telephones. One phone was attached to a kitchen wall with a long coiled handset cord; which allowed my mother to talk to her friend down the street, make a casserole, wipe counters and watch out the back window to check on her wild children chasing each other in the yard. There was another phone in my parents’ bedroom, plugged into the wall with a cord. We had one phone number – which only changed when we moved. It was our main means of immediate communication. At first we had rotary dial phones. Each numeral of the phone number had to be dialed – actually dialed – and it probably took 10 seconds to place a call depending on the number. Which gave you time to change your mind if need be – or think more about what you were going to say. When we changed to “touch tone” phones, it was a big deal. As I got older, “my own phone” always topped my birthday list. As the family grew larger, so did the number of phones. We could all pick up the various phone extensions and share conversations with grandparents and friends. Now, with cell phones, that’s not possible – unless you crowd around a phone while on speaker. Less private and less intimate.

If I wanted to tell a girlfriend my latest news, I would call her. She would call me. We talked for a few minutes or an hour. No answering machines – if I wasn’t home, I missed the call. Making a long distance “toll call” cost extra. If a local friend moved – even just a few towns away – we switched to writing letters. And patiently waited for the post office to send our letters back and forth.

Penmanship was an actual subject in grammar school – we all learned “cursive” writing soon after learning to print. I had to practice the fine art of slanting each letter the right way and crossing the “t” just so. Over and over. We were graded on penmanship in quarterly report cards; which was always my downfall. I think I was in too much of a hurry. My penmanship always “needed improvement.” The only behavior issue…”refrain from excessive talking”….

When I spent summers at overnight camps (either as a camper or a counselor), dozens of letters went back and forth with friends and family. I also saved dimes, nickels and quarters (or called “collect”) to use a pay phone to call home every so often. The sound of a human voice always made a difference. I could pick up on the nuances of tone and emotion in my mother’s voice, for example, which added an extra dimension…one way or the other…to the conversation. I could sense when a friend said she was “okay,” that maybe she really wasn’t — something I could only tell by hearing her voice. “What?” I might ask. “What is really going on?” When I lived in a dormitory at college, my roommate and I shared one phone. Also attached to the wall.

Now it’s texting or quick calls while en-route somewhere else on static filled speakerphone or bluetooth connections. Conversation is condensed, nonexistent or limited to short bursts. Now, a friend or family member calling to ask “how are you?” is often replaced by a texted “how R U?” Or the cell rings and I hear a breathless “I’m about to get on the bus/subway/train. I only have a few minutes…what’s up?” Landlines allowed us time.

One might argue that texting increases communication, but its intrusiveness & lack of dimension may put up an unintended wall. Communicating when I was growing up was more straightforward. I didn’t have to interpret what an emoji meant or if my friend was avoiding me by not texting back. Childhood friendships can be tricky enough to navigate without worrying about….”what did she mean by that text?” or “what’s with all the capital letters?”

And bullying by text is truly a more cowardly act than when it was face to face. When I was a kid, the mean girls passed notes or used words; but it stopped at the end of the schoolyard. Texting meanness and tapping “send” is so much easier and so much more toxic.

Conversation Time: Times Past

May 25, 2018 ~ oneletterup ~ 5 Comments

Irene Waters’ “Times Past” prompt challenge topic for this month is Conversation Time: https://irenewaters19.com/2018/05/01/conversation-time-times-past/

I am a baby boomer and grew up in suburban USA. What an interesting topic!

I was the oldest of 5 kids. The kitchen table was the setting for most conversation when we were all together. It is where we ate all our meals (unless company was coming and then we used the dining room). The kitchen area was fairly small, so we were very crowded around the table and filled up the room. My clearest memories of “talk” at meals? My mother’s (and sometimes my father’s) voice: “Hold your fork correctly” (directed at my brother repeatedly), “Get your elbows off the table” (directed at all of us), “Chew with your mouth closed” (could have been anyone), “Remember only a clean plater gets dessert” (everybody). All that concentrating on manners may have prevented much talking about school, the weather or what was going on in the world.

I do, however, recall a few exceptions. When I was in the 10th grade I learned how to dissect a frog in science class. That night at dinner I compared it to the chicken leg I was expertly cutting off the bone, carefully removing the meat and exposing the ligaments, etc. “Look! this looks like pipes and stems!” That did not go over well, as everyone promptly lost their appetites. I never lived that one down.

And another time…right in the middle of dinner, my brother (I think he was 10 or 11 at the time) chose a quiet moment to look at one of my sisters and call her a douche bag. Any conversation ground to a halt. No fork correcting. Mouths, full of food, hung open in disbelief. Uh oh, I thought. Apparently he had just heard the term used in a derogatory way at school and was obviously quite proud of himself. “WHAT??” both parents shouted. “Do NOT Ever Say That Again.” And then…much to our surprise, my mother asked him…”Do you know what a douche bag is?” When it became obvious he had no clue, she (privately) explained exactly what it was. I think he was horrified. He never used the term again (at least at dinner) and reverted to more common insults that didn’t involve ladies’ private parts. The conversation drifted back to comfortable topics once again. “Put your napkin in your lap!” “Finish your milk!” “Say please!” Which was, perhaps, just as well.
We all did grow up with excellent table manners.